It is a huge loss of independence for someone to voluntarily give up driving their own car. Most of the clients that you will stay with will have been driving for fifty years or longer. To give this up means that a certain amount of freedom and independence has been taken away from them.
It is also a very hard division to make, and one that you as a carer must not make without serious consultation with family. It should be the family who make the final decision – if your client is unwilling to do so.
However, in the time leading up to this decision being made, your client may still insist that he or she is fully able to drive.
Before you put your point across to the family that they are no longer safe to drive, you should have a list of reasons to back your up your concerns.
Some problems at the wheel:
- Getting confused in a familiar neighbourhood.
- Drifting over into the other lane.
- Slow foot movements between pedals.
- New bumps and scratches on the car.
- Complaints about the speed of the other drivers.
- Comments from neighbours or friends about ‘the way he/she drives’.
- Anxiety about driving at night.
- Increase in insurance because of collisions.
- Delayed reactions when the lights change.
Being the passenger in a car - where you do not think the driver is not capable of getting to the destination safely - is a very scary thing. It is also a sensitive subject, and may be the cause of friction or even arguments.
Most of the time the family will be able to persuade Dad that he should hand the driving over to the carer, but occasionally you will be met with reluctance. You should handle this with care and tactfulness. Never refer to the fact that you think they are unsafe to drive.
You may suggest that if you drive, your client can direct you. He will be able to sit back and enjoy the scenery while you drive.
After you have succeeded in convincing your client that they should no longer drive, you should take care to defer any car decisions to them, whether you know the answer or not.
If you need to put petrol in, ask them where they would normally go, which they would use, and the best time to avoid queues.
Remember that the car still belongs to them, and for a long time after they have stopped driving, they may still feel frustrated because they now rely on you.
